thirty days of thanks challenge.

In the spirit of November and Thanksgiving, I completed the thirty days of thanks challenge again this year and the I'm thankful for the exercise in itself! What a great way to mindfully reflect about all of the good things, big and small, that are in your life. I completed this challenge back in 2013 and did a mini version last summer, if you want to take a look!

Here we go!

• Day 1: Today I'm thankful to be recovering from Halloween, a favorite holiday of both my son and my husband. Check out little man hulking out! We did so much trick-or-treating that today was spent relaxing and trying to get all traces of green off of N's face :) 
• Day 2: I'm still reveling in our awesome Halloween and put this little collage together of every costume that N's ever worn for Halloween. How cute is this?!

• Day 3: Some days I swear that Nate is a carbon copy of my husband. I took him out to run some errands tonight and in Bed, Bath & Beyond, he "pulled a Chris" and set off about twelve of these talking/singing Christmas toys :) 

• Day 4: Today I'm thankful for some true fall weather! There is a crisp, not cold, feeling in the air. The leaves are beautiful! Our next electricity bill will be amazing! (if a bill can in fact be amazing)
• Day 5: We've been watching Inside Out a lot and, much like the little girl in the movie, Nate has an inner goofball island that drives who he is! I love all of his little quirks, even if he does gross things like lick me when I just want to take a picture with him :) 

• Day 6: Today I'm so thankful for my Nana, who celebrated her third heaven anniversary today. I sat and looked through pictures, listened to old voicemails, smiled at the flood of memories, and had myself a good cry. Oh, how I miss her! 
• Day 7: Best laid plans can fall apart quickly ... and that's okay! It's taken me a long time to even consider that as an option, but I'm learning to accept it. We had grand plans today to fill up our Saturday. Then rain came, along with a migraine for me. Sometimes allowing yourself a bit of grace to fall apart or re-prioritize is a huge thing to be thankful for. 
• Day 8: Shopping with my kiddo used to be something that I dreaded, but we've grown out of the days of fearfully running through the store in case of an ill-timed poopy diaper or running away to exercise new-found toddler independence. Instead, he is my right-hand man and helps me navigate through the store. 

• Day 9: What is life without dogs? Our pups are stubborn as anything, but they bring some extra needed chaos and love into our lives. They spend their days roaming around the house to nap in sunny spots and their nights hogging our beds. 

• Day 10: Another Inside Out themed thankfulness thought! Ahh, alliteration. N looked at me today and said, "I'm Sadness. Pull me."

• Day 11: Today I'm so thankful for all of our veterans, past and present, who put everything on the line so that we can enjoy the freedoms that make life so sweet. Both of my grandfathers served, setting tremendous examples for our family. 
• Day 12: I've been loving the Dollar Tree lately to find some fun and inexpensive things for my house. Now that Christmas is right around the corner, I'm starting to explore all the fun Christmas things that they have - including these really fun magnets. N loved putting the different pieces of Santa together. 

• Day 13: Today I celebrated with a bit of ever-illusive ME time! My parents took N out for dinner and Chris got in late from a business trip, which gave me about an hour and a half to myself. I grabbed some necessities from Costco, settled down with a glass of wine (one of the said necessities), and read part of a new book. 
• Day 14: Christmas card pictures! I'll be the first to admit that I stress myself (and the rest of my family) out each year to get these taken, but I love the final results! We're not the best of taking family photos throughout the year, so this is my one guaranteed shot each year. I'm not going to share the photo that we're using on our cards this year (yet), but today the thing that I am thankful for is my ever-goofy son who makes family photo taking an adventure!

• Day 15: I spent a lot of time reading this weekend. I haven't read a book for fun in a long time and I'm absolutely loving this one - The Magic Strings of Frankie Presto by Mitch Album. I really appreciate the imagery, the musical approach, and the story so far. I have a feeling it's going to cause me some tears toward the end, but that just means that I'm invested! :) 
• Day 16: I'm so thankful for my three nephews and (finally!) baby niece. I wish that I lived closer to all of these little goofballs, but I am loving watching them grow up into such awesome kids and Nate sure does adore them, too. 
• Day 17: My friends are the absolute best. It's kind of amazing when people appreciate your own special blend of crazy and still want to spend time with you :) I've gotten especially close with some of the girls from work over the last few years and I really just don't know what I would do without them! 
• Day 18: In prepping for the holidays, I'm especially thankful for our home. It's where we brought N home from the hospital, where he has grown up, and where Chris and I have learned to be parents and better spouses for one another. It's my haven and, while the improvement wish list may always be in the back of my mind, I'm so thankful for this place! 
• Day 19: Thankful for N's teachers today and everything that they've done over the years to take care of my kiddo. Tonight they prepared a Thanksgiving dinner for all of the families and I was more than pleasantly surprised to see what N is thankful for! 

• Day 20: Am I a total nerd to be thankful for a cleaning schedule? Yes, but I am anyway. I've made some small changes and the schedule is probably the best thing I could have done for my sanity as we move into the holidays and life gets even busier! 
• Day 21: Thankful for this kiddo's little mind today. His creativity and imagination keep his little mind busy for hours and the story lines are, more often than not, hilarious. 
• Day 23: Nate can't read yet, but his interest in being read to has skyrocketed over the last six months. Before that we generally read three books a night before bed, but now he initiates the process and generally chooses around twenty books. So we read .... and read and read and read. I generally will read until he falls asleep (ha! that doesn't happen often) or my voice starts to give out (the much more likely of the scenarios). I'm still very worried about him starting kindergarten next fall, but this eases my mind a bit! 

• Day 24: Crafting with kids can be an adventure. I'm finding that these are so much easier to do now that Nate is a little older and we both have fun. And I spend considerably less time worrying about mess. We made these little Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle ornaments tonight. So easy to do and we made an awesome little memory in the process! 

• Day 25: Thankful for an unexpected extra holiday from work that will extend my Thanksgiving mini-vacation! 
• Day 26: As we celebrate Thanksgiving, I'm thankful for family: the family that I grew up in, that I married into, and that Chris and I created. We hosted a delicious dinner, had some more than interesting conversation, and this cute little centerpiece actually got us thinking and talking about what we're thankful for! 

• Day 27: Leftovers! After a more than busy day of (Chris) whipping up Thanksgiving dinner and hosting, I have never appreciated leftovers and the microwave more! 
• Day 28: Nate is a trickster who has a great sense of humor - we see this all of the time. And sometimes we see this really sweet, caring soul peek through and it just makes me smile. Nathan spent hours today drawing pictures of soldiers and then devised an entire plan of walking door to door in our neighborhood to leave them on doorsteps. The purpose was for parents to give to their kids who want toy soldiers. Such a sweet idea, right? Adorable but terribly awkward in execution. Thank goodness for my husband who walked around the neighborhood with him tonight...hopefully the neighbors don't mind! 
• Day 29: Decorating for Christmas makes me a bit neurotic to have everything be 'perfect' but I love what the house looks like afterward. The boys decorated most of the tree this year and I only rearranged the ornaments on a very minimal level afterward :) Our house is so pretty right now!

• Day 30: Even though it's always hard to get back into routine after a break from work, I think we appreciate our jobs more than ever this year. Sometimes it's the journey and (especially) the valleys that make you reflect back and rediscover appreciation.

And there you have it! The little, the big, the daily minutiae that makes my heart swell up and put a spring in my step.

be kind, be thoughtful, be genuine, but most of all

BE THANKFUL

five.

Another year older, another year wise, and another year further away from being my little baby. Nathan turned five this weekend! This kiddo is sweet, energetic, a little shy at times, and absolutely hilarious. I took him out to the battlefield this weekend to do some golden hour photos for his fifth birthday. Here are some of my favorites!

At five years old, Nathan:

• Absolutely adores playing Lego's and spends hours after school each day playing 
• Is so close to swimming on his own! The swimming lessons that he's been taken over the last two months have made such an improvement in his confidence and his basic swimming skills
• Loves all things disgusting - including body parts, noises, smells, etc. 
• Telling stories, real and imaginary, to his parents, teachers, and friends
• Negotiating...bed time, play time, treats, you name it. The kid likes to stall and look for loopholes
• Saying things that are hilariously insightful or just plain out there. Nate has a quirky little personality and it's been shining through a lot lately in some of the funny things he's been saying (check out the most recent round of nathan-isms)

And now, for the questions that I ask Nathan every six months. It always makes me smile to see how these change over time (check out his answers from four and four and a half)

1. What is your favorite color? Green
2. What is your favorite food? Pizza
3. What is your favorite t.v. show? Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
4. Who is your best friend? Owen
5. What is your favorite animal? Lion
6. What is your favorite song? Honey, I'm Good by Andy Grammer
7. What is your favorite toy? Lego's
8. What is your favorite movie? Bolt
9. What is your favorite stuffed animal to sleep with at night? Winnie the Pooh
10. What do you want to be when you grow up? A cop

Happy 5th Birthday, little love! 

daily doses of sweetness.

I've been using my happiness jar and I'm not the only one, either. That in itself is something to be happy about! For every weird or annoying thing happening that pops up and distracts my attention, like accidentally taking 329 pictures with my phone while it was in my pocket, I've found little things that are just so sweet to re-focus on what matters. Sweetness is a perfect way to add balance and perspective into what can become a hectic day.

Nate has also really gotten into drawing pictures for us this week. One day when he wasn't particularly looking forward to going to school, I reminded him that he could draw me a picture while he was there. When I went to pick him up, not only was he incredibly focused on his picture but he had eleven others to bring home with him. I thought that maybe he was drawing a diagram of how to set the table, but apparently this is a family portrait.

Yesterday we got a lot of snow -- which makes N think that it's Christmas. After shoveling twice (!), I was super sore and had a nasty headache brewing. When I went to take a nap, Nate came in and covered me up with a blanket, gave me his teddy bear, and gave me a kiss on the forehead before telling me to get some good sleep. So adorable and my nap was glorious!

Another day I'll admit, I wasn't my best self. I had a rough day while Nate was at school and then tried to cram in too much in too little time. Rush, rush, rush ... and pick up from school got me back into perspective. Nate discovered marbles. Something so simple, not electronic (because, well he's obsessed), used some critical thinking, and was fun. He talked about this little marble maze for hours after we got home! It reminded me of neighbors that we had when I was a kid who had so many marbles and gave me some when I moved away.

And then there's this cape: this gift that no one will ever be ever to top and constant staple in his wardrobe. Nate's aunt and uncle gave him this cape for a birthday or Christmas, I can't remember, and I'm pretty sure he's worn it every day since. He often pairs it with some snow boots and gloves to pretend to be a "bad guy" to stomp around the house. This is how he stomps around the house every single night...and the lighting in this picture is absolutely perfect.

I'm hoping for a fun weekend with my boys! We've got a birthday party party to go to, a kids workshop, and I'm determined that we're going to build a snowman before all of this snow melts away!

four (and a half).

My little boy is four and a half! I really shouldn't call him a baby anymore, but he will always be my baby! Four and a half means endless energy, rare naps, a budding vocabulary, and a problem solver attitude that is scary sometimes!

At four and a half...

• N's life is consumed by all things ninja turtles!  Toys, shows, movies, creative play, it all comes down to TMNT. He watches the show that is on Nickelodeon, but has also gotten into the cartoon that aired in the 90's (circa my childhood!) which he refers to as the "little" turtles. 
• When it comes to food, Nate is still so picky! He's still drinking his strawberry Pediasure and trying to subsist on a diet that is more representative of a toddler transitioning to "real" food, but we continue to provide options at every meal (which go uneaten). 
• Even though N's room is fun and has every single toy under the sun, he still likes to relocate to play. The bathroom floor, the hallway, anywhere is fair game. You learn to shuffle to avoid the excruciatingly painful experience of accidentally stepping on a figuring or, heaven forbid, a Lego. 

• And speaking of Lego's, if anyone else buys him more I will SCREAM! I love the creative aspect of Lego's and that they promote critical thinking and fine motor skills. However, he's not really there yet. His interest is in having one of us assemble (and endlessly reassemble) while he demolishes whatever set he's playing with. Maybe next year? 
• Nate is a regular when it comes to field trips! His class has taken a few this year (pumpkin patch, grocery store, my old high school to see the band and orchestra, and the Children's Museum). He is most excited about sitting in the bus and tells me that he likes to sit in the back of the bus (naturally). At least he's so cute rocking his preschool t-shirt! 

• When it comes to school work, I can't say that Nate is totally enthralled, but he's trying. That's all I can ask. We're still slowly working on letters, but I was SO proud when he wrote a recognizable "N" amongst his scribbles on my dad's birthday card this year. 
• A new milestone for Nate is that he's mastered the mouse and has gotten really into playing kids games on my laptop! There is a computer for the kiddos to use at preschool and he's gotten into playing strategy and math games, complete with his own special blend of sound effects.

• Nate's most frequent request for bedtime stories are currently either the Five Little Monkeys or Little Critter series, with some Scooby Doo peppered in for a little variety. 
• Dressing up like a "bad guy" is a favorite, in which he wears his winter coat (by the hood, like a cape) and his snow boots. His snow boots were purposefully purchased to be too big (so he can wear them next year), so there's lots of clomping around the house! 
• It's a lifelong lesson, but he's learning the power of patience! Maybe he can teach me next :) 

And to continue on my little tradition of asking questions over time and seeing how the answers change, here's a quick review of N's answers at three and a half and his answers at age four. His most current answers: 

1. What is your favorite color? Blue
2. What is your favorite food? French fries
3. What is your favorite t.v. show? Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
4. Who is your best friend? Theo and Morgan and Oliver
5. What is your favorite animal? Turtles
6. What is your favorite song? Taylor Swift's "Shake it Off" or, what he refers to as "The Booty Butt" song -- watch the music video
7. What is your favorite toy? Shredder
8. What is your favorite movie? "You are mistaken - I just like Ninja Turtles right now, not movies"
9. What is your favorite stuffed animal to sleep with at night? My big bear
10. What do you want to be when you grow up? Astronaut

We'll rinse and repeat in six months!

 

mini-thanks challenge.

Last November, I did the thirty days of thanks challenge and really enjoyed it. There was something about pinpointing a specific moment of my day that gave me the warm and fuzzies that was very introspective and purposeful, but also made me realize that I have so many moments throughout the day to make me thankful. I highly recommend doing that type of exercise, whether or not you want to make it public, and I plan on doing it again this November.

That being said, I wanted to do a mini version of the challenge and focus on thankfulness for a week. I've found myself overwhelmed lately and not being my best self. What better way to turn it around than to focus and celebrate the good, tiny, crazy, unexpected, and wonderful parts of my life.

• Day 1: My husband and I celebrated our sixth wedding anniversary earlier this month. We've had an eventful and blessed six years, but over the last year especially I've felt that our partnership has grown so much - cherishing our strengths and complimenting and coaching one another's weaknesses. 
• Day 2: My hubby gets two days in a row. This guy steps in and does everything that I can't or don't want to do (like clean the fish tank, gag) and still can sit back and enjoy things with the joy of a little kid. 
• Day 3: Nate's enthusiasm is absolutely contagious. He is a master salesman at the age of four, coaxing me into buying toys, extra stories at bedtime, and spending hours outside playing with the same superhero toys over and over and over. When it comes to trying new things, if in his area of interest, his excitement and sense of adventure is unmatched ... even if it is something as simple as making pancakes. Mickey Mouse pancakes, that is. See the pride on this little face?
• Day 4: Reverse psychology. Sometimes I worry that I'm breeding disobedience, but the immediate struggle is to get my kid to eat something that is slightly health and/or unprocessed. My strategy is to tell Nate that I'm going to eat a snack, in this case bananas, and he giggles while devouring "my" snack in front of him. The day that he finds out that I can't stomach the idea of eating a banana will be my undoing! 
• Day 5: Artwork that comes home from school is the best. I love to see Nate's projects and they're even more special when they're for a special occasion, like Mother's Day. I finally got around to framing his project from this year - a picture collage, handprints made to look like a butterfly, and a sweet little poem. Excuse the glare from the light but this little beauty is up in my bedroom and is one of the first things that I see each morning. 
• Day 6: Balance is a tricky thing. I know that Chris and I both are guilty of not seeing our own friends as much as we would like to lately, but Nate is becoming a social butterfly in his own little way. Last weekend we had back to back parties where we watching Nate play his little heart out and met some new parents ... all while being just a smidge silly :) 
  
  
  
• Day 7:  Upcoming vacation! We work hard, so it's about time for a well-deserved break. Chris and I haven't taken a vacation since our honeymoon, so we decided to take the plunge this year. We tried to schedule one for our one year anniversary, but I managed to fall and break my ankle, have surgery, and be a mess right beforehand. Barring any unforeseen catastrophes, we will be taking a vacation this year! Very excited to spend some quality time with my boys! 

nearly thirty.

Yep, that about sums it up. On the eve of my thirtieth birthday, of entering a new decade of life, I realize that I am precariously balanced between not wanting to let go of my twenties and embracing a new tier of adulthood. I'm at a place in my life where I drill into my son's head that he must say "yes ma'am" but cringe when anyone else calls me the "m" word.  My hair follicles are waiving a quite literal flag of surrender, as I've skipped having a few stray grays to having blindingly white hairs that I rip out in horror on a near daily basis. Lucky that I have thick hair, eh?

I hit a lot of life's milestones in my twenties: graduated with my Bachelor's, started my first "real" post-college job, got married, bought a house, had a baby, graduated again with a graduate certificate. Check, check, and check. I'm not sure what all of my goals were for my twenties, but I think I had a pretty great decade. Supposedly your thirties bring on stability but the fun continues because you're not that old. We'll see!

The planner in me wants to put a thirties to do list up for the world - but hopefully this new decade has a few good, unexpected surprises peppered in:

• Finish making babies: I really think I could go through one more pregnancy, max. I'm not one of those women who loves it. I'm forever in love with my kiddo and the selfish part of me doesn't want to divide that attention in too many ways - one more would be a perfect balance.
• Finish my Master's: in something. I have lots of grad coursework in about 3 different areas. It's commitment time! 
• Hone the art of mothering & marriage: practice makes perfect, or at least helps you keep things in good shape. Relationships require constant maintenance and I love working at these. 
• Learn how to cook: the older I get, the more unacceptable it is.
• Do more fun and spontaneous things: again, the planner and practical side of me wins. On one hand, I am organized and dependable; on the other hand, I live and die by the calendar. 

 Okay, that's enough introspection for one night and certainly for one post! Back to prepping for Nate's fourth (!?) birthday party. If my own birthday doesn't make me feel old, my kid's birthdays certainly do :) 

pause.

Sometimes I just want to hit 'pause' and freeze this season of our lives. As challenging as the terrible threes can be, they're also so funny and awe inspiring to me. In one moment, Nate will ask me the same question eight times and, after getting an answer that he doesn't want, try to do it anyway. In the next moment, he's spouting off some quippy or intuitive thought that flits across his mind.

I had a conversation with a lady in Target the other day that started off with her asking my opinion of an outfit and ended with talking about the different ages and stages that she's watched her seven (!!) kids go through. With kids who are in their late twenties, all the way to 24 months, she said that "each year gets more fun". And she's right. Each year is an increasingly fun and rewarding adventure, but each year is also so precious. I wouldn't want to trade Nate's baby days for anything. That little chunk brought out a new level of love that I've never felt before and gave me a crash course into motherhood - 

Now, we're able to have actual conversations and I'm able to really appreciate his personality, his sense of humor, and help to train him to be the best person that he can be when he gets older. I've seen a burst in his language skills over the last few month; my child now uses prepositions, pronouns, and articles regularly and correctly! The fact that we are moving from child-caveman speak ("me hungry")  to full sentences ("I'm a little bit hungry. May I have a snack please?") is a huge deal. I think every parent with kids has said the phrase "use your words" about a billion times. It's exciting to finally be at that point!

For the record, I'm still convinced that Nate doesn't sleep as much as other kids his age. We had an unprecedented moment last week where Nate fell asleep at 8:00 p.m., but then woke up before midnight raring to go. Never again! On any given day, he can run laps, not take a nap, not have sugar, and still be running full steam at my bedtime. He exhausts me but I wouldn't have it any other way!

hats & filters.

Have you ever taken the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) assessment? I have. It's been an eye opening and integral part of my professional and personal development over the last few years. Basically, there are different personality dimensions that represent your preferences - not what you do 100% of the time, but what you gravitate to and find a sense of comfort in. It's funny how just a few letters can set you on a path to a deeper sense of self-awareness. My personality type is:

Introversion
Sensing
Thinking
Judging

I love my 'S' and my 'J'. I embrace the ability to take in all of the details and plan the hell out of things. I love order, facts (I work in an ideal job where I am up to my ears in data), and I organize everything. The combination of these preferences makes me feel borderline OCD, but as long as I am a highly efficient and functioning OCD, I embrace that too.

The combination of my "I" and my "T" tend to screw me over. Ahh, this blog of mine is generally photos of my kid, but we're taking a different direction tonight. Introversion: pretty self explanatory, right? I am not a center of attention, public speaking, first to volunteer kind of girl. Thinking: this one is a bit tricker. I like to think of this as logical and rational, without being clouded down with emotion. This isn't to say that I'm an emotionless robot, but I make decisions after thinking out pros and cons, and you will rarely hear me say "I feel blah blah blah" (unless it's about being tired).

So back to my dilemma: I don't want to sugar coat, I like to say it and hear it straight, and I cannot stand nonsense or hemming and hawing over a situation because of being uncomfortable. Just.say.it. Combine that with introversion and the result is that I have a lot on my mind without much coming out of my mouth. I think this stems from a sense of awareness of other people's innate preferences - if a person is more drawn to feelings and emotions, I am respectful of that personal space. Respectful to the point of losing my voice.

Enter relationships, the boundaries in which you feel a certain level of comfort with others (and therefore comfort to venture outside of your preferences), but in which you are the actor of a certain role. The metaphor about wearing different hats is an appropriate illustration for this idea: I am a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend, etc. etc etc. In each of these relationships, there's almost a contract of behavior that requires you to strap on your compassionate filter, your understanding filter, your hold-your-tongue-until-you-nearly-bite-it-off-filter. In a perfect world, I could throw both my hat and my filters out with last week's garbage, but that would leave the 'feelers' in tears and my relationships in shambles.

It's time to find a better balance.

the little things.

enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things

-robert brault

It's been busy lately, the tough kind of busy that makes you wonder: if you're burning the candle at both ends, is there anything left? Lately my days have turned into nights and my nights have gotten much shorter. It happens. We're all busy. 

Pushing through. One thing that has been helpful, dare I say motivational, has been to pick a favorite moment of the day and capture it. I've been doing this for the past week and it's served as a needed reminder of thankfulness. In no particular order....

-1-

At our (drive-thru!) pharmacy: 

Pharmacist: What is the last name pick-up? 

Me: Darder. D-A-R-D-E-R

Pharmacist: And the first name? 

Nathan: DADDY! 

-2-

Nathan sharing one of his beloved cake pops with his GiGi for her birthday...and I use the term 'sharing' very loosely because he tried hard to get all of it. This was just such an adorable (and hysterical) moment.

-3-

Reading together has become one of my favorite things for Nathan and I to do. Lately, he has really loved the 'Little Dinos' books like this one. I bought them through the Scholastic reading club at Nate's preschool and they have paid for themselves many times over! When Nate gets the urge to slap something, he's gotten so that he looks at me and says "Mommy - little dinos don't hit". Amazing. 

We just got a new book order delivery in today and we got TWENTY books! I let Nate circle what he wanted in the flyers (fine motor skills, plus interest!) so we ended up with mostly Mercer Mayer's 'Little Critter' books, with a few Doc McStuffins, Bubble Guppies, and Jake and the Never Land Pirates mixed in. We read them all in one sitting tonight! I may have no voice tomorrow but with little man cuddled up with me it was just perfect.

-4-

I've said it before and I'll say it again: my kid has a ridiculous amount of energy. On weekends, we generally keep him up and running all day, no nap, and he's still not falling asleep until late. We have the same struggle during the week. Case and point, the other night after a full day of school, playing outside, and running laps through our house, around 11:00 p.m. But hey, if you're going to be up late, why not go out with a bang?

-5-

We celebrated Chris's 34th birthday this past week! I got off of work early, bought a surprise cake and presents, and then conspired with Nathan to decorate before Chris came home from work. Nate picked out all of the decorations for the house (some tissue balls, crepe paper, plates, and napkins in Chris's favorite colors - Nate was especially emphatic about the napkins). He also picked out a few gifts for Chris

Our convo at checkout...

Nate: Today is Daddy's birthday! 

Cashier: Oh, that's very nice. It looks like you are having a party. 

Nate: Yeah, I am getting him these soldiers and a pirate sword. They are a present .... maybe we will share.

And of course, we had some fun in the party section in Target: 

Chris never did get those soldiers or the pirate sword, but that's okay - I think he's pretty happy with his new PS4! 

-6-

After muddling through a lot of rainy days, we got a nice little burst of beautiful weather. I got Nate a sandbox (pirate themed, of course), 200 lbs. of sand, and received bliss in return. On Saturday he played in there for three hours straight without so much as a peep. I've heard that sprinkling cinnamon in sand will help keep bugs out, so we'll give that a shot once it warms up a bit more. In the meantime, this little kiddo is having a blast. 

-7-

Chris threw out his back over the weekend (cutting ice cream cake of all things) and he's been pretty miserable over the last few days. Let's be clear: this isn't the point of this "favorite moment" :)  In times where one of us isn't feeling our best, I'm so happy and comforted by the fact that I have a partner in crime. This time it's me helping him, but come next migraine, I know that he's got my back. 

find gratitude in the little things and your well of gratitude will never run dry

-antonia montoya

three (and a half).

I've strayed away from the monthly updates that I did until Nate turned two and, even though I always found myself running behind posting them, I miss having the little milestones to look back on. I'm going to shoot for biannual updates, but we'll see how that goes. In the spirit of tradition, I'm a little over two weeks late to the party with this post.

At three and a half...

• Nate's imagination is working overtime! The pretend play, imaginary friends (or fellow superheroes), and intricate story lines make it so much fun to watch him play -- but not too closely because he's now valuing a sense of privacy! 
• The more intently Nate plays, the more he sings. All playtime has a soundtrack and I seem to get his own blend of pirate songs and Star Wars stuck in my head long after he's headed off to school or gone to bed for the night
• Nate is fully potty trained during the day and only rarely has an accident at night. Finally. Potty training was a struggle to start, but he caught on quickly. I'm happy to cut down on the pull-up buying because just recently Nate's decided that he hates them! Insomnia pays off though, because there's many a night that I've intercepted a half-asleep kiddo trying to find the bathroom in the dark
• Whoever coined the phrase "terrible twos & threes" was an idiot and clearly not a parent. I think that it should be "trying twos and terrible threes" - and dare I predict "flippant fours"? While my kiddo is discovering how to use his words to convey complete thoughts and feelings, he's not afraid of mincing his words and having some pretty spectacular tantrums. Luckily the tantrums are less frequent, but certainly memorable (and deafening)
• Speaking of using words, Nate's come out with a few phrases that were pretty cute/funny/where-in-the-world-did-you-pick-that-up-from: I promise I'll [...]; these can be a little tricky; I'm so tired and sick of you; may I have [insert item here] please? It's my faaaaaavorite [crosses arms over chest and does a quasi-piroette]
• This child loves his dogs. LOVES. Every day after school the dogs get huge hugs and Nate says "They miss me so much. Look - they love me!"
• Nate has started to learn the value of responsibility and earning his just rewards. His big helper duties around the house include putting his (non-breakable) dishes into the sink when he's done with his food, helping to feed the dogs, and cleaning up his toys every night before bed. While I'm sure he'll be an allowance one day, his pay comes in form of sticker currency which accrue to special treats, like a Starbucks cake-pop.  
• Keeping up with the trend set at an early age, I'm convinced that Nate does not sleep enough for his age (or heck, for mine). I rejoice if Nate is in bed before 10:00 p.m. and he's always up by 8:00 a.m. at the latest. Naps have tapered off quite a bit - school day naps are getting shorter and weekend naps are virtually non-existent. If I could only have a fraction of this kiddo's energy, I would be set! 

And to start a new tradition! Making a list of questions for Nate to answer and then to see how these change! :)

1. What is your favorite color? Blue
2. What is your favorite food? Goldfish crackers
3. What is your favorite t.v. show? Jake and the Never Land Pirates
4. Who is your best friend? Connor
5. What is your favorite animal? Giraffe
6. What is your favorite song? Happy Birthday
7. What is your favorite toy?Soldier Pirates & the Joker
8. What is your favorite movie? Jungle Book
9. What is your favorite stuffed animal to sleep with at night? Winnie the Pooh Bear
10. What do you want to do when you grow up? a cowboy and a barista

 Let's do this again in six-ish months ...

secrets about motherhood, vol. 2.

Remember the last round of secrets? I have more 'wisdom' to impart! I'm not sure if parents just get too tired to share this with their friends who haven't had kids yet, if we don't share to keep the human race going, or if we just become so used to the day-to-day that a second thought isn't given to passing it on.

Bodily Fluids 101...
Your life will revolve around bodily fluids, but mostly you will fixate on poop. Is the color okay? Consistency? Is your kid pooping too much or not enough? If you think that this may taper off once your little one is potty trained, you are dead wrong. Your attention will turn to things such as teaching kiddo how to wipe without using an entire roll of toilet paper in a single sitting or covering your house in absolutely disgusting hand prints.

The Poker Face
You'll need to master your emotions and how they play across your countenance. Fact: kids will do some crazy, completely irrational things that they absolutely believe in doing. Sometimes you may need to close yourself in a bathroom or closet or behind a shower curtain so that you can smile and laugh in semi-privacy. I laughed once while he was playing with an ice pack and now he wraps them around his face and chases people around our house to smush his face on them. Frostbite in this house is a definite possibility.

Just this evening, Nate wanted his privacy when using the bathroom and a bit later I walked in to find him pumping antibacterial gel down his butt crack in lieu of wiping (and we've made it back to our first secret). I wanted to die laughing but instead I had to remind him about all the good work that TP and wipes can do for him.

Do Not Disturb
"Me" time becomes a thing of the past or contorts itself so that it's nearly unrecognizable. My "me" time tonight consisted of folding laundry while watching a show that wasn't a cartoon while Nate alternated between playing in his room and pretending to 'fly' down the stairs. Other days it's hiding in the bathroom to drink a protein shake (the kid loves anything chocolate flavored) or blissfully enjoying a fifteen minute trip to Target by myself.

When Words Can't Do Justice...
Photos are not impossible, but a direct challenge. The number of photos that I take and delete is completely ridiculous - I thank my lucky stars that I live in the days of digital! Murphy's Law of Photographing Your Kid: they will be the most photogenic, still, and cute when your camera is out of reach. The second that you even think about getting out the camera, a tornado erupts and they scurry out of the room, leaving a trail of food, toys, and sometimes clothing behind them.

Persistence can be key though. I hide my camera so that it's within arms' length -- it still took me almost a week to get a picture of this...

Sleep is Precious
I think it's safe to say that babies and well, offspring in general, can be equated to a lack of sleep. Parents try to prepare themselves and are given good but seemingly impractical advice of "sleep when the baby sleeps" (do it! your laundry list of to dos and the laundry can wait). The flip side of this equation is that you will go to crazy lengths to get and keep your kid asleep. Surely you've heard about infants being chauffeured around town for hours just to get them to sleep?

The older that Nate's gotten, the harder it is to get him to sleep. At school, he's on a strict routine with peer pressure reinforcement. At home, it's one of my biggest challenges. I'm to the point where I have given up on naps on the weekends. Occasionally I get duped though - I mean, the best game plan when this happens is ... ?

That's right, you may find yourself trapped in your car for a bit. I've learned to embrace this though. As long as I don't have someone waiting on me, I am more than content to grab a coffee (hello, Starbucks drive-thru!), some lunch, and have a moment to myself ... even if it means loitering for a bit :)

CC

In the off chance that the television is on AND it's not a cartoon AND it's something that you, the adult, would like to watch, closed captioning is a godsend. Between my two dogs and a child who loves both the sound of his own voice and the cacophony of toys as they fall down the stairs, it gets loud in my house. LOUD. Only a crazy person would add to the decibel level in this house, so CC helps me to have a glimmer of understanding of whatever show I'm getting away with watching.

More 'revelations' to come ...

thirty days of thanks challenge.

The thirty days of thanks challenge is popular this month, but the challenge can actually be done in any month and ideally, year round. I chose to do this challenge through my blog rather than Facebook so that I can have all of my thoughts in one place. This has been such a great exercise! It's reminded me the larger influences in my life, as well as to pause to appreciate the seemingly smaller, fleeting moments.

I'm not sure how most people approach these challenges, but these people and things are by no means presented in any order of importance. As the month went by, I found inspiration in aspects of my daily life that made me feel grateful and blessed.

• Day 1: I am thankful for my family: for my little family of three and for my extended family of whom I've lost count. At the end of the day, these are "my people" and I couldn't be more blessed. This is a photo from Christmas 2012 of my little family, my parents, and siblings.
  
  
• Day 2: I am thankful for all things caffeinated, especially my Starbucks. With the amount of sleep that I run on sometimes, my coffee is what helps keep me going and a functional person :)
  
• Day 3: I am thankful for my camera. It's certainly not professional grade, but it helps me to churn out some high quality images to capture our memories. I look through my photos and go down a trip on memory lane.
  
• Day 4: I am thankful for my different circles of friends. It's funny how being an adult sometimes breaks down your friendships into various cohorts: college, work, mothers, neighbors, school. These folks help to lend both a sympathetic ear and some great advice, as well as offer up lots of fun.
• Day 5: I am thankful for our right and responsibility to provide our opinions on how this country should be run through the voting process. It's something that is taken for granted all too often and I need to remind myself of that.
  
• Day 6: I am thankful for my Nana who, on this day, celebrated her first anniversary in heaven. It's hard to think that it's been a year since we lost her...it still feels like just yesterday.
  
• Day 7: I'm thankful for our home. Being a homeowner is an enormous sense of pride and responsibility. It's hard to think that we've been in this house for about three and a half years already!
• Day 8: I am thankful that I have channeled my inner thrifter. Chris and I work hard for our money, so I try to make every dollar count. From coupons, to deals, to online yardsales, to consignment, to free kids clinics at the home improvement stores, I try to balance practicality with some fun. All of these toys were made for FREE at Build & Grow Clinics at Lowe's and Kids' Workshops at Home Depot:          
  
• Day 9: I am thankful for a son who, while energetic and stubborn, can be sweet and wants to make us proud of him. Just tonight he asked if he could read to me at bedtime.
  
  
• Day 10: I am thankful for my husband who works tirelessly during the week to get in extra hours to support our family. He's a keeper! 
  
• Day 11: I am thankful for our nation's veteran's who have and continue to serve our country. I am especially thankful for both of my grandfathers who took care of our country and our family.
• Day 12: I am thankful for the past five years (and counting) at a job that I love, which nurtures my professional goals, challenges me, and affords me with the flexibility to maintain an important life-work balance. 
  
• Day 13: I am thankful for the opportunity to continue my education. I've always been a good student and while grades are VERY important to me, it's even more important for me to be a lifelong learner and set a good example for my son. One of my educational goals has been to have conferred graduate-level credit. Well, today I applied for graduation for my Graduate Certificate in Academic Advising from Kansas State University! One day I'll get my Master's...baby steps! 
  
• Day 14: I am thankful for Nathan's desire to help and to learn new things. Once he comes home from preschool, he is my shadow if I am doing any sort of housework. Tonight, he helped me with laundry by moving all of the laundry from the washer to the dryer. Even more amazing (and a bit startling) was that once everything was in the dryer, he knew how to hit the power button, select the cycle, and push 'start'. I see a chore chart in our future! 
  
• Day 15: I am thankful for my OCD tendencies that help me to stay organized and on top of my game, for the most part. It saved me several times this week at work!
• Day 16: I am thankful for 'sleep in Saturdays'! The work week can be long and exhausting, so Chris and I developed a new system about a year ago where I get to sleep in on Saturdays and he sleeps in on Sundays (as long as we don't have any conflicting plans). It's such a nice thing to look forward to! 
• Day 17: I am thankful for the rare and fleeting moments of calmness in my house. With a three year old boy, a husband, and two 'vocal' dogs, it can get loud. Moments like these in the morning help to even out all of the craziness! 
  
• Day 18: I am thankful for the safety and security of our family and the general area where we live. Sometimes it takes a wake up call to remember to be grateful and fight for this sense of security.
• Day 19: I am thankful for my son's sense of humor. Between the inflections lent to his words and his mannerisms, I generally have a hard time stifling my laughter with this little guy (even if it's something that he wasn't supposed to do to begin with - remember these fiascos and what happened when he needed a little course correction?)  Well today we took a look at all of the things that the kids in his preschool class said that they were thankful for. A good 90% of them answered some form of mommy, daddy, or both. My kid's answer? T.V. 
  
• Day 20: I am thankful for whoever came up with the "clean up song" (and no,we don't watch Barney). This song is pure magic and Nate is conditioned to stop whatever he's doing and put everything he owns back in its designated spot. Magic, I tell you! 
• Day 21: I am thankful for my undergrad experience that helped me through a crash course in becoming self-sufficient, as well as helped me to 'check the box' with a degree to demonstrate capability of learning. Let's be honest, that's what bachelor's degrees really are in today's world. I treasure the time that I spent at JMU, the things that I learned about myself, and for the people that I met ... and the fact that I can now dress my kid up in JMU gear and it's adorable.
  
• Day 22: I am thankful for the wonder of imagination. After Nathan's bi-annual haircut (I know, it's terrible to wait that long), we walked around the mall to see the Christmas decorations. Nathan found one of the coin operated rides and had the best time sitting on the different parts of the ride. I love that he doesn't remember that they actually move - who carries cash around these days, much less change? Nate was perfectly content to pretend to drive his boat and "catch monsters" as he told me. It really is the little things.
  
• Day 23: I am thankful for the sense of balance that I attempt to keep in my life. The last year has been a huge hurtle as Chris and I have taken graduate courses simultaneously, but we've learned how to work together as a team to help fill in the gaps. This weekend is a perfect example, as I have a big paper due and he has to log some hours at work. Planning, patience, and coffee!
• Day 24: I am thankful for being able to witness the little things and milestones that Nathan hits - it seems that the older we become, the more that we take mannerisms and behaviors for granted. Just today, I walked into the restroom to check on him and found him like this. Where in the world did he pick this up? lol
  
• Day 25: I am thankful for the opportunity to use my paid time off for my staycation. Nate and I went bouncing today, had an absolute blast, and we are exhausted
  
• Day 26: I am thankful for being able to make small changes around the house from time to time to make everything feel more cozy. I decided to retire our bedding set and invest in a new one that I found on Groupon. It finally got delivered today. I love the design and color even more in person than I did online!
  
  
• Day 27: I am thankful for having a husband who takes care of me and all of the craziness that goes on at our house when I'm having an off day. Today's migraine hit me pretty hard and now that I'm able to tolerate a small amount of light and sound, I'm starting to feel like a real person again!
• Day 28: I am thankful for the chance to get together with relatives every year to celebrate Thanksgiving. Chris and I switch off years with our families - last year we went to Texas, so this year it was my turn! When we first got there, Nate started to play with the other kids immediately and five minutes later told me that he was too busy to eat because he was playing with his friends. Made me so happy! :)
  
• Day 29: I am thankful for being able to decompress after an eventful holiday! Today, I got to edit my pictures from yesterday, spend time with my brother & sister-in-law and nephew, and do a whole lot of nothing. Get ready for a three part day of thanks!
  Part I: I got to watch the video of the James Madison Marching Royal Dukes lead off this year's Macy's Day Parade! I always tear up at parades and I've always loved marching bands, even though I did orchestra. It's perfect that I ended up living with band people in college and remain good friends now. Congratulations to the MRDs!
  Part II: To continue the JMU trend, I am so happy that we were able to take a few photos at the JMU campus. We took a photo at the "life sized" statue of James Madison (poor guy!) and then upon seeing the statue of the Duke Dog, Nathan immediately stuck his head into the dog's mouth
  
  
  
  
  
  
  Part III: Spending time with Chris's brother, sister-in-law, and our nephew! I am going to miss them so much over the next few years. I mean, how cute are these two together?!
  
• Day 30: I am thankful for the holiday season! It took every bit of restraint that I had not to decorate for Christmas before Thanksgiving, so we spent today putting up the tree and listening to Christmas music. I love that Nathan is old enough to help this year. He had a great time putting on a few ornaments, although we did suffer a few casualties. We now have a tailless dog and a spaceghost that is no longer a real ornament. It's starting to look a lot like Christmas!